First Step in Becoming Autonomous City
Federal Realty Investment Trust continues to add to its tremendously successful Santana Row and bolster its byline, “700 shops, 200 restaurants, 19 spas, 10 hotels, 1 Little Saigon,” by focusing on ethnic consumers after deciding to incorporate a Vietnamese business district to its mix of uses.
“This is just a natural progression towards our goal of becoming a completely autonomous city,” said head of Federal Realty West Coast Operations, Dawn Becker. “We can’t just cater to young, white, affluent people, That’s not the fabric of a real city, unless you’re, well…um… Santana Row, I guess.”
Along with their cultural focus, Federal Realty has proposed a city hall, convention center and flea market, and plans to start to subsidize national chain restaurants, “just like downtown San Jose.”
We fully intend to operate as a large city,” said Federal Realty lobbyist Kerry Williams. “Along with expensive consultants that are ignored, exhaustive reports that are immediately moth-balled, and huge restaurant subsidies that are unwarranted, we want to mimic the real-world situation in downtown by adding an unpopular event like the Grand Prix.”
She promised that along with a democratically elected Rowcouncil, an independent governmental body, they plan to add nightclubs, homeless squatters at their Starbucks stores and riot police.
John,
Isn’t it interesting that Santana Row does so well without any intervention (RDA assistance, etc.) from local Government? It perplexes me that this can be so. I’d love to hear from readers on this subject.
Is it time to pull up the Downtown signage and relocate it to Santana Row?
If it truly is serious about becoming a big league city like San Jose, Santana Row must focus more on ignoring road and sidewalk maintainance. Also, they must discontinue the taking care of the avenue trees. These should be neglected until shopowners get fed up and hire gardeners to hack them up and leave the debris on the street.
That’s very funny. Check out our take on the debate over at Santana Row Insider—a fresh look at Santana Row Politics.
Santanarowinside.com
John—The autonomous city of Santana Row could be enhanced dramatically from the improvements you suggest to its present outrageously successful condition by the addition of Forrest Williams as Mayor for Life, Phaedra as City Manager directing Bob Brownstein’s surging Benefits for Employees Dept. Just a suggestion. Negotiations over salaries and benefits would be unnecessary if SEIU were to take over Human Resources. Maybe even get into education by moving the County Office of Education over to Winchester and Stevens Creek to replace Crate and Barrel. Such an attractive location closer to Los Gatos might get the attention of Ms. Wilcox and lure her from retirement. “Education” uber Retail would assure the “success” of an autonomous Santana Row! George Green
#1,
Downtown would do just as well as Santana Row if the police didn’t focus so much attention on aggressively detering customers away.
The only people who visit downtown regularily are poeple who don’t mind the pathetic needle prick attitude of the police.
And Santana Row would do as bad as Downtown if the police treated the customers at Santana Row they way they treat the customers downtown.
A sad and vicioius circle. Treat good people like thier lowlifes downtown; so they go to santana row where your treated like a VIP! Downtown suffers.
Clearly your humorous remarks show the failure of downtown. It is time for Mayor Reed to embrace fascism with regard to running the city government. I know, I know, Italy and Germany gave fascism a bad name, but it is really a good way to govern. Mayor Reed should use threats and intimidation when dealing with city workers. Also, he could have a secret police force to deal with the filthy scum of downtown. Murder, mayhem, extortion, arson, bribery and assault would be the “carrots and sticks” to bring city councilmembers around to see the light and balance the budget.
In keeping with the proven, successful theme of emulating downtown San Jose, the Santana Row management team has announced they will install speakers throughout Santana Row, and blast the sounds of aircraft throughout the complex. Additionally, foggers will spew toxic carcinogenic jet fuel exhaust throughout the complex.
“We feel that these changes, along with our Flea Market and Little Saigon additions, will create ambience, and finally allow us to effectively compete with downtown San Jose for the cream of the crop in Santa Clara county shoppers.” said spokesman Dilbert “Dill” Doe, MBA.
Any truth to the rumor that Palm Theater will soon be coming to The Row?
http://prosites-prs.homestead.com/ward-new.pdf
Funny article! If you go to some of the clubs, I think you might think it’s Little Saigon some nights.
Bernie (#8),
Read the link. Wow! You are one messed-up little dude.
Any truth that residents that fled from San Jose to Saigon in the Gonzales era are trying to establish a “Little San Jose” business district in Saigon?