Might Lead to Pandemic of Political Recidivism
A recently released scathing report by San Jose State University found that many of the state’s mayors were not able to pass the California Mayoral Exit Exam now required in cities with a human population that is less than the number of its registered lobbyists.
This is the first year San Jose has qualified with an official lobbyist community that numbers well over the city’s 945,000 inhabitants. The newly mandated test is meant to guarantee a certain performance standard from the mayors of cities that have been literally infested by hired shills trying to sell access. But the official report says that the test not only doesn’t work, it is forcing “political recidivism” on its innocent citizens across the state.
“The system was supposed to flag those with miscalibrated moral compasses,” said political scientist Larry Gerston. “Instead, since there is a provision for ethically disabled mayors, a one-year pass allows those that fail a chance to return and govern for a ninth year and repeat their agendas. This obviously does irreparable harm to the communities in which they originally served and failed.”
As fate would have it, in its first year of required testing, San Jose finds itself in that exact postition. Mayor Gonzales has failed to pass the test and is looking at an extra year, his ninth, as a paralyzed leader.
“We are choosing to focus on the mayor’s strong areas of testing,” said mayoral spokesman David Vossbrink when asked the reason for Gonzales’ failure. “He did very well on the essay section about political action committee funding, was very strong with the true/false questions about rapid transit, and he aced the travel section—and I am told those are a few of the more challenging parts.”
When reached for comment, the agency responsible for administering the testing only hinted that the mayor struggled in the vision, consensus building and know-your-Brown-Act-facts areas.
Some critics say enough is enough. According to San Jose State political professor Terry Christiansen, “We don’t need a test…everyone knows that the secret of effective governing for big-city mayors comes from cutting their teeth in a smaller city or gaining experience from a county seat first…” He quickly caught himself, “Oh…um… my bad.”
I think one of the qualifications to John’s test would be how the mayoral candidates appear in local ethnic garb ala Reed and Cortese at the Tet Festival. Seeing those two dressed up in ethnic attire solidified my decision on my choice for mayor. I can imagine our Vietnamese brothers and sisters running in the opposite direction.
I wonder if there were any questions regarding the use of garbage as an alternative fuel. It certainly has fueled a lot of unrest and many investigations. Wonder if he passed that part.
Oh Richard, come out, come out, where ever you are……
As silly as the guys looked in the ethnic garb, that is hardly a reason to vote for or against them. Part of the problem with our electorate is that is how they make their decision on who to vote for—what they wear, how they look, etc.
It would be refreshing if the candidates actually spoke to the issues and the people based their votes on the substance of the candidates statements and not on how they were dressed (i.e. Chuck would be disqualified immediately based on that silly tie he wears—but if you ignore that and listen to what he says there is more substance to him than that tie.)
Demand substance from those running from office and ignore the silly pandering of dressing in costumes, etc.
Dan, it bothers me that people are deciding to vote for Cindy (I’m assuming) based on the stupidity of that Chuck & Dave show at Tet.
I’m with everybody else and agree that Chuck & Dave made both fools and whores of themselves at the same time. Just the dumbest thing, and they better fire whomever it was that advised them to wear those costumes. The Hope & Crosby comparison in the Merc’s letters section this week really nailed it.
Ridiculous as this was, it wasn’t enough to cause me to even consider voting for Cindy. She aligned herself with Gonzo and has supported him right up to censure. She’s a lousy public speaker. She’s downright arrogant and has no business holding any public office, especially mayor of a city with a population of nearly 1,000,000.
Vote for Cindy and you’re guaranteed the status quo for another 4 years. Is that what we want? I don’t think so.
I haven’t made my mind up, and it may not be either Chuck or Dave that gets my vote, but I’m not ruling them out either because Cindy must not win!
I usually don’t get into political discussions because they usually don’t solve anything. My idea of a mayoral candidate is not any of the present council members. I would like to see someone, who is qualified, but not so political run. I haven’t made any judgements on the non-council candidates because I haven’t met them yet.
Here’s a thought: Let’s elect candidates based on their positions and their records…not on what they wear at ethnic festivals.
Would this same issue be raised if Chuck & Dave wore cowboy boots to a rodeo or a Sharks jersey at HP Pavilion?
For all I care they can wear a clown suit to the circus. What I really want to know is what they will do for the city.
Let’s not sweat the small stuff.
Dan, we share the same idea for a mayoral candidate this time around. I’m hoping one of the outsiders has what it takes and can gain the necessary support to defeat all three of the sitting council members in the primary with more than 50% of the vote. That would send a clear message to City Hall.
Alas, we live in a town overrun with apathetic suburbanites. I am not optimistic, even if an outsider makes it to the run-off.
Mark ” fools and whores” T. may like this made-up new story:
Mayoral candidates, Don Cortese and Chuck Reed were quick to take advantage of a front page photo opportunity in the Mercury News last Monday, when they appeared in traditional Viet Namese garb at the Tet Festival. Although the local District Attorney’s Office are alleged to be overzealous in their pursuit of convictions, it appears the Fashion Police are letting these two get off easy. Perhaps because they realize that political candidates will do anything for a photo opportunity in a campaign season.
In a related story, after seeing Mike Cassidy’s front page story about the locally produced snow ball kept in a San Jose freezer for the last 30 years, Reed and Cortese rushed down to the San Jose residence to be photographed with the snowball – each donning a top hat, muffler, corn-cob pipe and a button nose.
Cindy Chavez, after investigation of the snowball’s career in San Jose, is of the opinion that 30 years ago the snowball was paid less then other snowballs in comparable cities, and proposed to the City Council that the snowball be awarded a retroactive bonus.
Nice, MB Knott.
Those of you who remember once cramming for exams should take pity on the mayor. He not only studied hard for his Exit Exam, but on a dark gray afternoon, just days before his ethics test, Ron Gonzales reached out to a higher power.
It was an afternoon that will not soon be forgotten by either of the participants.
Father Etica, aged and wise, was skilled in that most mystical of rituals, the exorcism. He reassured the possessed, desperate politician as he went about his preparations, adorning the nervous mayor with the appropriate relics and sacred substances. The mayor stood carefully balanced on a donated Cisco 3600 Series Multiservice Platform, the durable chassis that may well become the standard platform for all City of San Jose demonic-related ceremonies. His feet were ceremoniously sprinkled with cross-cut shredded paper—a gift from the grateful laborers at the recycling center.
In his clammy hands the mayor clutched not a crucifix, but his résumé.
The priest went to work. The Presence was felt almost immediately. Father Etica called out to it—demanding that it reveal its identity.
The mayor was sweating profusely. The room seemed to want to spin. He felt a great tugging… a twisting… a terror. He feared another stoke was upon him. It was then that all hell broke loose.
The mayor’s head, unable to twist for lack of a neck, heaved violently to his left pulling with it his whole body. The rotund mayor begin to whirl like a dervish, his eyes bulging, his tongue swelling, his hands clutching his résumé in a death grip.
It was then that the Voice made itself heard.
“Ohhhh…”
“Who are you!” demanded the priest.
“Noooo…” came the Voice.
“Reveal thyself!” thundered the fiery exorcist.
“Joooo…” conceded the Voice.
Father Etica pressed the battle. The demon was well-known to him. It was an ancient evil, one filled with an Old World Italian anger and avarice. It was a demon that had wrought much destruction. The priest used all his powers, his every ounce of strength. The Clash went on for an hour before, in an eruption of profanity and threats, the demon screamed in agony and fled his host’s spent and battered body.
“Wow,” exclaimed the mayor as he began to come around, “I feel, I don’t know… at peace.”
“That is not surprising,” responded Father Etica, “for you were possessed by war. That is why in your life you saw so many good people as enemies.”
“War?” asked the mayor. “War is a demon?”
“Well, war is the English translation of how the demon is known in the Old World,” explained the priest. “In Italian the word is Guerra.”
I agree with Leo and Mal C. here. In addition, I notice a lot of people here base their vote on slick campaign mailers and cute 30-second TV or radio commercials, and campaign slogans. I think back to Measure A in 2000 with its sliding BART doors and its rosy promises to relieve gridlock in the Valley. (Remember the slogan “Traffic Relief Now”?)
I met someone in South San Jose on the 68 bus a year ago who voted solely because of the commercials mentioned. He complained on how come there’s less bus service since that vote back in 2000. Even when I showed him all 23 pages of the County’s Civil Grand Jury report on how VTA had mismanaged his tax dollars, he looked at me as if I was insane for bringing it up. I just looked at him and told him that, by not doing his homework before voting, he got precisely the failed leadership was complaining about. He ended up thinking about it longer before realizing the mistake he made. Hopefully he learned his lesson.
Those who emphasize and advertise style over substance depend on We the People not taking the time to do our homework and utilizing the Internet and/or their local library to get the facts first. When it comes to deciding who will represent you – at every level of government – please make sure to put substance before style. It will make for a better quality of life in the long term.
Let me see if I have this straight – south bay taxpayers (aka shmucks) are supposed to pay big for BART so that it’s easier for people in OTHER communities to get to their jobs on First Street and downtown San Jose?
So what about the people who live here? What do we get out of the deal?
Oh sure, BART is now in San Jose – so everyone in the Santa Clara county is going to drive to downtown SJ and take BART to San Francisco?
What’s that? I’m supposed to take lightrail or bus to downtown and then take BART to SF?
Absolutely laughable.
Even goofy Santa Cruz had enough good sense to nuke their last big transit bill.
Mayor Ron Gonzales today announced that he was going to implement the New Orleans clause in the Alviso annexation contract.
City Hall know-it-alls were quick to point out that this has never been done before and commended the Mayor for his forward thinking.
Essentially the N.O. clause allows local builders to design and build a system of half measure dikes meant to keep the bay out of Alviso.
It should be noted that Councilperson Cindy Chavez applauded this plan because it would allow continued employment for her union constituents and the local builders she has come to know and love for their money.
Some may recall that the dikes are not to be built to high and that none of the dirt scooped out of the area to drop it below the level of the bay may be used as fill.
In addition, all of the dirt used must be washed until it meets the standard of the EPA for non-polluting earth andstill support the growth of native only plant life.
I seems likely that Gonzales will lead the Dike Commission upon his leaving city hall. He seems well qualified for this position since his trip to Mississippi several weeks ago. As he says, “I learned a lot about water while I was there, and I know that once it starts to flood an area, lots of federal money is available to stop its incursion.”
“A ceremony will be held at the new marina in Alviso sometime in the future to kick start this program”, Gonzales added.
CALIFORNIA MAYOR ARRESTED FOR DESTROYING PUBLIC RECORDS
A man who scattered important public information contained in more than 100 file cabinets was arrested on Friday, police said.
Ron Gonzales, 56, Mayor of San Jose and part-time worker for a waste management company, failed his test to successfully complete his service time as Mayor of San José.
Police believe that he scattered important City documents to vent his anger at the results of the State of California required exam. “It was an awful sight,” stated Police Sergeant Matt Williams. “It was freaky experience to see this approximately five foot two inch, middle to upper middle aged man totally lose it in front of co-workers and visitors.”
Visitors at City Hall initially thought is was an outraged contractor reacting the paper work requirements imposed on him by the City’s building department.
(…for those that witnessed the incident, please feel free to add to this news story….)
Hey,
What’s next for David and Chuck? Cinco de Mayo is around the corner maybe they can dress in sombreros and ponchos and say how much they love Latino’s!
My vote is for someone who is real, born and raised in San Jose and not some other city and that will actually do something for this poor city of ours!
Need I say more…..
GM
Dan & GM,
Some of our “native sons” heritage here in El Pueblo de San José de Guadalupe involves sombreros, ponchos, even the love of Latinos.
What I find ironic is the candidates with the Hispanic surnames (Gonzales and Chavez) seem to have the least in common with San Jose’s Latino community.
Why fault Chuck or Dave for making an effort to reach all groups in a diverse city?
Hi GM!
Spoken like a true native son. There ain’t many of us. I’m on your team. No more Funnyvale rejects.
MAL CONTENT,
Just to remind you Gonzales and Chavez weren’t born in San Jose. What can they have in common with this pueblo of Guadalupe?
Hope you understand my point; politicians are like that! They will do everything and whatever it takes to win (even dress funny) they are all full of promises in their campaigning. Once they are elected, they stop dressing and faking that they love Latinos or Vietnamese, and then everybody realizes that wherever came from their mouths were ONLY PROMESIS!. I’m tired of politicians that don’t help out our communities. We should give an opportunity to a new candidate that say’s he is NOT a politician.
GM.
Gonzo for Governor
You heard it here first. Straight from the presses of the SJ Murky News, and the K Not in the know TV (KNTV)
Gonzo pledged to a sitting room only crowd at the newly renovated san jose performing arts building.
Stating that he pledges that by the time his term in Sacramento is over, He will bring Baseball and Bart to Sacramento. He said that Sacramento is a major league city, being the capital of the 4th largest economy in the world. He further states to pledge to make Sacramento the 10th largest city in the Country and be more populous then San Jose.
When asked about this, he stated that what I learned to do in San Jose by scaming and lying to the people, I will do for the whole state of California and Sacramento.
He also pledged that if he is elected Governor, that will also bring a great garbage contract to the capital of the world’s 4th largest economy.
Lets hear from David Pandori, for Mayor:
So far we know he has degrees in Environmental Studies, City Planning and Law. Sure he’s “Book-Smart”, but what about experience?
It appears that he has professional experience with important issues that affect our city. He should know the obstacles he will have to face to implement his vision for the City because he was on the City Council for two terms.
Since then he has worked as a prosecutor for the D.A.’s office. He’s experienced the dark, seamy side of the city: how people can be corrupted by the need for immediate gratification and, lacking moral standards, make poor decisions that ultimately harm the rest of society. He probably experienced some of this while working in the DA’s office, too.
But let’s hear from David Pandori himself.
BART. Baseball. Redevelopment. If you think David is going to listen to what the masses or you want, think again. Just ask the Rosemary Gardens neighborhood. At least council member Chavez has a history of actually listening and helping neighborhoods.
How about having Cindy herself tell us what her plans are. At least that there will be a paper trail so maybe she will actually do what she says—I doubt it, but maybe.